I used to think being a good communicator meant being clear. Direct. To the point. No fluff. I’d say exactly what I meant, exactly how I meant it. And then I’d wonder why people got defensive.
A colleague once told me: “You’re not wrong. You’re just hard to hear.”
That stung. Because I wasn’t trying to be hard to hear. I was trying to be efficient. I thought communication was about delivering information. Turns out, it’s about making sure the other person actually receives it.
Quick Answer: How can you increase communication in the workplace?
You can increase workplace communication by balancing directness with empathy, listening more than you talk, and adapting your style to the person you’re speaking with.
The Problem with Being “Just Objective”
One person I came across put it this way: “If you think your perspective is objective, then you are simply unaware of your biases.”
That was me. I thought I was just stating facts. But to others, it came across as confrontational. When you present your worldview as “the truth,” you’re not leaving room for anyone else’s perspective. And people don’t like that.
A friend of mine once said: “Communication has nothing to do with you, and more to do with everyone else around you.”
That reframed everything for me. It’s not about what I say. It’s about how it lands.
The Map Is Not the Territory
Another person shared a helpful framework: “The map is not the territory. All models are wrong but some are useful.”
We all have our own “map” of the world. Different experiences, different biases, different assumptions. What seems obvious to you might not be obvious to someone else. And that’s okay. The goal isn’t to force your map onto others. It’s to find where the maps overlap.
When you approach conversations with that mindset, you stop trying to win and start trying to understand.
A Better Way to Give Feedback
One person I knew struggled with this too. He was a consultant, used to working with technical professionals. He said: “In business, it is just information. People just need the facts.”
But someone else responded: “People want to feel connected. We are animals and react to basic needs. So it is how you convey your information with depth and sprinkle some of your personality in there, rather than just being direct and to the point.”
That advice helped me. It’s not about watering down the facts. It’s about delivering them in a way that people can actually hear.
The Empathy Shift
If you’re someone who values directness, the idea of “softening” your communication might feel wrong. Like you’re being dishonest. I used to feel that way.
But empathy isn’t about being less honest. It’s about being more effective.
One person I came across said: “Communicate clearly but with empathy, balancing directness with respect for others’ feelings, and always be open to feedback.”
That’s the balance. Clear, yes. But not cold. Direct, yes. But not dismissive.
A Practical Tool
I found this approach helpful. When you’re about to say something, ask yourself:
- What’s the point I’m trying to make?
- What tone am I using?
- How will this land with the other person?
If you can answer those three questions, you’re already ahead of most people.
Final Thoughts
You don’t have to change who you are. You just have to be aware of how you come across. Clear doesn’t have to mean cold. Direct doesn’t have to mean dismissive.
As one person wisely said: “It’s not about becoming someone else. It’s about being heard.”
And if you’re someone who’s been told you’re “too blunt” or “hard to hear”—start small. Slow down. Add a little warmth. Ask a question instead of making a statement.
You’ll be surprised how much easier it becomes.
